24 hours

Pictures/life for the last 24 hours are as follows:

1. I couldn't sleep last night. So I took a picture outside of my window. It was really bright out for 1:48. I say B+ on that one. I love the grain, the colors, the feel, its creepy.

2. My room/current state of mind. Its a mess. C+.

3. My homework. It is so much more entertaining to take pictures of it than to actually do it. B.

4. My homework, again. B+.

I need to get my actual grades up and my life grades up too. Basically I need to focus in all areas of my life. I'm too loose with time, organization. I need to buckle down.

It's 1:16 and I should have been in bed over an hour ago

Friends make me happy. I'm really glad I have good friends and not crappy ones. And I'm glad I don't have to see my friends from home every single day of my life. I think we'd kill each other. I love them though, really, I do.
Life is busy. Today was nuts, but I got a lot of econ done - I read three chapters.
I don't even want to think about all the work I have to do the rest of the week.
Running, yoga - both are good.
I love the first picture. B+. I hate the second. D.
It's bedtime.
Quote of the day by the Texan first lady, speaking for some stalker awareness thing: "Victims of stalking are not alone."

Life moves on, however sadly

President Gordon B. Hinckley was an amazing man. He will be missed.
KH finally gave me the cd's. We are going to try and figure out her life this week and hopefully watch Requiem for a Dream.
I'm no excited for this week.
While it is so happy that President Hinckley will be with his wife again now, it is still sad. I wasn't really fully aware of how sad I would be until ward prayer.

Picture: of the cd. C. I give the cd itself though an A-. KH has exceptional taste in music.

Upside down twisting beside myself

Snowboarding is one of the most entertaining things one could ever hope to do.
I'm sore. But it was worth it. W and I went up to Brighton and had a great time.
I give myself B-'s on both. Mountains are beautiful.
Tomorrow is going to be crazy! Life is busy. I'm almost halfway done with my mission papers. I'm really excited to see where I go.
On that note, adieu.

. . . strange.

Tiramisu is delicious. I just went to this random Italian restaurant where I had lots of food and it was surprisingly good. Nothing compared to good old Maggiano's but it was still decent.
Pictures today are lame. D's on both.
And why the heck did 70 people read my blog yesterday? That was weird. 3 people from Japan. 4 from the UK. People from all over were reading my thoughts and looking at my pictures. Seeing as this is more for those who actually are involved in my life and not really something I'm writing for the world that is kinda funny. I'm not sure how I feel about it, at all.
I'm going to watch Requiem for a Dream with KH tonight, she has an edited version.
Work was kinda boring. Classes were.
I'm not in a mood to think. I'm going snowboarding tomorrow, that will be freaking fun.

Self, great day!

Today was an adventure. Upon wasting time for visiting hours, talking to KH for an extended period of time and successfully completing my economics homework, I made my way to bed at 2:35 ish, which in turn made for very little sleep. I woke up at 7:40 and threw on some clothes and went to modern, where we made shapes and explored space with our bodies. I sometimes feel the class would be better if everyone were on drugs (not that I've ever been on drugs). We found partners and had to create shapes together without touching or talking, just moving. Everyone was really close, and it was weird. But it was kinda fun too.
I then went back to the dorms, showed, got dressed, then met up with LL, LCL, and LW. I fell asleep today in class, again. Then it was over to the MOA and I had a delicious lunch with EW, SR, and CL. It was good to see them.
Training was canceled today! Work was kinda not fun though...I was at the window which was fun but I had to tell like 3 people that basically it sucks to be them because all their classes were deleted because they failed to pay tuition. I realize it's college and all but honestly, tuition is like 2000 a semester. If you can't do that then I don't know where they heck you plan on going to school. It's already dirt cheap, people need to stop whining.
Yoga was awesome. We did lots of asanas, we moved a lot. Then LB and I ran a mile, did some monkey bars (which are really hard. Little kids make them look easy and I guess they were when we were little, but now...wow. It is tough) and then we did 50 crunches. Then we did it again. And again. So tomorrow when I can't move, that is why.
Probably the happiest part of my day is as follows. I actually intended to go to the south of campus to take some pics and walk around because I love the south part of campus. On my way I ran into CS and we shared an iPod and delicious music whilst we meandered in the cold and went down to the duck pond. I found a really awesome duck that loved having its picture taken. It stared right at me and just posed. It let me get really close. It was a random occurrence that CS and I met up but I loved it. And I really like today's picture. Not as loud in color but what color there is really pops.
I give myself an A- on the duck, a C on the wall. As for yesterday, I give myself a B, a C+ and then a B- (in that order, iPod, vitamin water, then hands).

Spin me round again and rub my eyes, this can't be happening.

I need a starting point. Breath. Last night in yoga my breathing rocked. I was on. It was good. Losing myself in yoga is my favorite thing to do in life at the moment. That and run.
I'm at a really weird point at the moment. I don't think I can accuractly convey my emotions/thoughts/musings but this will be an attempt.
I wish I were an accomplished lyricist and could write an eloquent song to express me at the moment. But I have my photography. Lately, my photography has been very anti the way I actually feel. As you may have noticed, its oversaturated, bursting with life, in your face, loud, vibrant, and fun. But I'm not feeling oversaturated. I've felt rather de-saturated if you know what I mean. Life still reatains a high volume of color but at the same time, not as much as I'd like.
The balloon picture was dead on. That one has been inside of me for a loooooong time. It really just...works for me. I can't really explain why, but that would probably be the best way to describe how I feel at the moment.
I want some orange juice. And I don't want it warm, pulpy, and especially not sour. Either you get that or you don't...but whatever.
I feel like I'm vomiting on my screen. It feels nice.
I'm listening to my cd for 2007. The one I made for KH. And it makes me happy that I was able to pin down the songs and feelings for each month. I did very well. But part of it...well, no. We won't go there.
Vagueness in abundance....sorry. This is just how I'm thinking right now. Thank you for being along for the ride (?).
Once again, in truth I've rarely had this much going for me in my life. I've rarely had this much to smile about, this little of drama. The most dramatic event of the day is sitting and listening to my friend's issues with thier roommates or significant others. It is a welcome break from having crap in my life. But that is the thing. There is. I just don't get it in my face every day. But when it shows up I just want to run away. Sometimes I literally do that. And I love it. I have so many freaking amazing friends here. There are so many incredible people that I know and have a part of my life its unbelievable. I'm using the most cliche words ever...oh well. But at the same time there is just this...this......feeling I guess that I'm not doing enough, or that I'm doing too much, or that things are just going to explode. The light at the end of the tunnel isn't a light. It's a strobe light. And I'm sick of it. I want off this merry-go-round. I want out. I want things to be normal again. I want my dad to have a job. I don't want to have to worry about how the hell I'll be going on a mission. I'm supposed to be excited. I am. But at the same time the whole situation causes me to freak out. I want to scream at the top of my lungs. I want to run as fast as I can to nowhere and just scream and scream and scream. I have an absurd amount of homework to do. I had a great time running with LB and then hanging out with RK and KH, as well as SH and others. JR is my favorite ever at the moment. He comes into my room and sits on my bed and just talks. And he always shows up at the most perfect times it isn't even funny.
Really, this is me being happy. I'm just stressed out about stupid things. I need a nap and a chill pill. A reality check wouldn't hurt either.
If it were warmer out right now I'd be running up to Narnia just to sit and think, even though I already ran today.
Pictures.....well. I like them. I'll grade them later. My real grades are mattering too much at the moment for me to grade things that don't matter. But that brings up a whole new argument. Arg. Poop. Sometimes I want to swear. Loudly. I also want some tiramisu. And no, not for the coffee or the alcohol. Although both sound tempting. Ok. Back to life. Thank you for bearing with me.

My parachute didn't open, but the pixie dust did not prevail.

Walmart proves to be one of the more entertaining locales in Utah. Sad, but true. I spend two hours there on Friday night. Why, you ask? I was playing a game. My friends and I split up into two teams, we each filled up a cart with 20 random items. Then we switched carts, and we had to put the items back where they belonged, no cheating, fastest team wins. It was me, Mobo, and Tla. Ctt and Kberg were on the other team. We filled our cart with...well, choice items. The best was "intimacy gel" I think. Saturday was fun, I was lazy. Today was lazy too. I'm wondering why life is continually on repeat. I kinda think I have it figured out, though. I just wish I could get a few questions answered. Actually a lot of questions. I have two regrets at the moment. I hate regrets. And when girls I like have boyfriends. I also hate it when people tell me to do things that go against my character. Not like bad things but things I don't do. Maybe I could try new things though, but I just don't want to. I'm tired of the new and shiny, surprisingly enough.

Now for the photos. I didn't actually try on any of them. I was just having fun.
First: Action shot of Kberg bowling from Friday. C-. Love the colors.


This is JR as we were bleaching his hair. I made his teeth suuuuuuper white because it fit the picture well to make it look crazy. Again, love the colors, C-.



...And I'm sensing a C- again here. I was in need of a new fb profile pic, and I'm vain.

Jeans are happy.

Jeans are able to be worn at work tomorrow. This is a rarity and cause for celebration. I spent a good 5 minutes in my closet and figured out my outfit and then I even went and ironed my shirt. I know, hard to believe.
Mika is coming Feb. 8th. I'm excited.
I went to JDogs today. Yummy. It is some random run down hot dog stand south of campus, and it is delicious.
Classes are good. Work is good. Tomorrow will be fun.
I really love my friends. I don't think I let them know that enough. The ones from high school especially. And I love my friends here. It blows my mind how many awesome people there are here. It is mildly overwhelming. I thought I knew lots of people in high school...but dang. Having a school of 30,000 definitely broadens ones social horizons. It rocks.
Yoga today was really relaxing and not too hard. I started snoring again in shivasana. Yeah...not good. LB tried to wake me up, and I did, although only for a moment- I immediately went back to sleep and snoring. Shivasana is one of the most unusual modes of being. I love it. I'm totally asleep, but I honestly think I'm awake the whole time. It's like I'm dreaming I'm still in the room and on my mat and looking at the ceiling and not snoring. But that isn't the case. I know I am snoring while I'm in shivasana, and I'm never ever ever aware if I am during regular sleep. Weird.
Radiohead is delicious on the ears. It's kinda like Bjork meets Coldplay.
The "your team" game continues to provide excessive amounts of entertainment. My favorite team member of the moment is grandma in leopard print jacket. Old people are so fun. I want to be a crazy old person one day and wear ugly sweaters and loafers and spoil my grandchildren and act silly and get away with it because people will think I'm senile. Life will be grand. It is already.
Yay for the MOA, vending machine field trips, tax forms, lists, movies and my cellular device.
Picture: Detail of my outfit for tomorrow that I so carefully assembled. I give myself...B-. I like the textures and the colors and the tone and the composition. Thank you, Lightroom and BS.

Hi, my name is ______ and I feel ______.

I'm sitting at my desk eating RitzBitz Sandwiches with Peanut Butter and contemplating reading some econ. I finished As You Like It last night. Today in class, I was tempted to throw something heavy at ER. I have never had a conversation with her. She is in my class, sits across the room, and is perhaps one of the most annoying people ever. She is a wannabe little-miss-perfect and knows everything about Shakespeare and is basically the best thing since sliced bread and wants the whole world to know it. Basically, she loses at life. Today when we got our quizzes, she was one of the first to get hers. I was the last. And I finished first in the class and left five minutes early. The look of shock and disgust that she gave me as I completed the insultingly easy quiz and handed it in and packed up was priceless. It totally made my day. I gave her a "yeah, I win, you lose, get over yourself" kinda look. Yay. I'm such a nice person.
Work today was fun. Lunch was good. That was out of order.
K is hilarious and we hung out with EN today too. I love them. And good food.
I was feeling like crap though, so I ditched LB and CE and didn't run. I miss my endorphins. They make life happy. I love visiting hours too.
Umm...today's picture. B. I like it, actually. I say a B+ even. I wanted to take a picture like this for a long time. It isn't what I had in mind but I still like it. I may redo it later with real balloons (not water balloons) and better lighting than my room light. As for any sort of connection to my life, well, I'm not sure. I just like it. A lot.

Grape vitamin water tastes like bad Dimetapp.

Vitamin water is my new drink of choice. I love the lemonade and the raspberry-apple. Last night JR and I ran down to the vending machines to get some but the stupid machine was broken again. Honestly, the drink machine is broken every other day. It is especially annoying when you are trying to get some milk from your cereal and you've already walked down the hall and stairs to find you can't get any. And then if you want some you have to venture to another hall and who knows if their vending machine is working. Or you can just go to Cosmo's, like JR and I did last night in the bitter cold. I didn't upload my photo yesterday. There was a lot I didn't do yesterday. Whoops . . . oh well.
Today was nuts. Modern dance, econ, devotional, lunch at the Skyroom with SY and then some quality study time. RO gave me two wet-willies today at work. She is just weird. I wanted to throw my vitamin water at her but decided that was a bad idea so I threw a paper crane when she was on hold, falling asleep on her desk. It was entertaining. We were bored after a bit and there were no calls so we went on a field trip to the basement to get snacks. She makes work interesting, that much is for sure.
Picture one (yesterday's picture) is of JR because I was lazy and didn't want to spend time on a picture. And he is kinda hilarious. I give myself an F. Lame picture. That is no reflection of JR as a person, though.

Picture numero dos is slightly better. Random, I mean all I did was take a picture of my EasyMac before I ate all of it. I had fun over-saturating it and adding vignetting. I love to make things look cross processed. That one gets a D+. I find it reminiscent of Andy Warhol's style, but that's just me.

1, 2, 3, 4...

Tomorrow is Monday. Ew. I like the weekends. They should last longer.
Today we had church, then Veggie and I ventured to the cafeteria for dinner. It was little hamsters and roast beef (little hamsters = chicken cordon bleu). They make me laugh. Then I read some of As You Like It, took a nap, cleaned my room, and am now waiting for visiting hours to begin in 14 minutes. I'm listening to Feist's 1234 and it is really addicting.
The picture today is random. I'm not sure I like it. I say a C.
I read something on JpgMag about taking underwater pictures just by using a plastic bag. When Lola and I do the Ophelia shoot for Humanities I may have to try it...

The white routine

Today I slept in until 10. It was rather relaxing. Then I got dressed, attempted to read some of As You Like It, ate some food, then went up to Salt Lake with K to look at wedding dresses. We picked up R, talked for a bit, got lost, and then, gracias a Google texting (arguably my new obsession) we found the place. Some of the dresses were heinous beyond all belief. However, we managed to find at least 5 that looked really great on K. One in particular was really hot, when K came out of the dressing room, me and R's jaws dropped and then we decided that one was best. K still isn't sure, but regardless of her choice she will look beautiful. I'm rather excited for the wedding. Today's picture comes from the whole adventure in SLC today - this isn't the jaw dropping dress but this one is still good, and it was probably my favorite picture I took today. I wasn't trying to be artsy or anything, I was just trying to get some shots of the dresses so K could look at them later and send them to her family for their opinions. I give myself....an 79.5. I'm not sure If I'm rounding or not.

Hmm.

Today. Classes, good. Work, good. I slept in till 9, went to class at 10, met MO for lunch at the Moa Cafe, went to Humanities. Then went to work where TL was hilarious. After work Veggie and I sat around admiring the wonders of facebook, then met up with Snuggle and Science for some delicious Indian food. Presh was absent from the adventure. Then I decided to take some pictures upon arriving back here, and W and K are making cookies, apparently going to bring some over.

I give myself a B today. I love how both of my self portraits I give B's to haha. I actually like the look of this picture a lot - the double exposure, grainy and cross processed look is one I love. I say B-, for sure. The subject itself isn't the most interesting, but I'm really liking the feel of it.

Fall off the edge of my mind

It's been a great day class wise. But at the moment, I feel like crap. I need to fix this.
Hopefully, things work out. I think they will. And if they don't...well, at least I tried.
During break and up until now, I honestly wished I could have come back here to Provo right after Christmas. I guess I still do, but I wish I could have had more time with certain people. I wanted to see people, I just wasn't excited about being home. I was excited to be in the real world and back home but...arg it's confusing and complicated.

Today's picture: first time I've done a self-portrait in a while. I like it. I say...C+ or B-. Simple. I'm not sure I'd call it striking. I like the lighting. Composition is good. But I haven't quite found anything that makes me go "wow" around me lately. I guess I'm just waiting for something really amazing to show up. Or for me to find it. Or, even harder, although most realistic, capture the trite and banal in an interesting way. And do it well.

Forget forgotten, I am moving past this, giving notice.

Last night It snowed like cah-ray-zee. Thus, we had a beautiful snow encrusted campus today. I got lightroom to work gracias a Benjamin, and I'm addicted to adding vignetting to my pictures.
I ran three miles today. Classes were amazing. I love it here. I just wish people could grow up sometimes. But overall, life is great. And I find the juxtaposition of Britney Spears and Broken Social Scene in my iTunes library hilarious.
And now for today's picture. I give myself a C+. It is decent. I like it. But it isn't wow. Given how the world looked today, this is pretty lame. But for being lame I like it.

I'm home now and coming around, I'm coming around.

Life is at an interesting point. I'm content. I'd even venture to say I'm really really happy. But I'm sick of certain things. But that is just how it is. I had a good day. There are just three things I wish I could change about my life. Wait. Four. All but one are outside by control. And the one inside my control, well, its unrealisitic. I thought this picture was funny due to the irony of it. I'm soooo not focused on things right now. I mean I am, just now what I should be. Again, vague statement after vague statement. But I love it. I love cheez-its. And when you really feel like someone is on the same wavelenght as you. And my dance class. And running. But back to the picture. I give myself a C+. I love the composition, the idea the picture in general. But the lighting, the contrast, ew. Ew. I need Ben to teach me how to figure out Lightroom. I may edit this one and re-grade myself.

UPDATE:
I edited the picture, kept in in color. I now give myself a B . I like it. It is good. Not wow, but good. It was far to flat in black and white.

This is what you get when you wake up early

Today was the first day of the semester. I liked it for the most part. I hated work today though, it was crazy! The line was at least an hour long. People were cranky. I woke up really early to get breakfast and get books. And I took a picture. The light coming over the mountains this morning was beautiful. I love waking up before everyone else and before the sun, the world is so still. It helps if you get a decent amount of sleep the night before because then you can be awake enough to appreciate it. I give myself a C for today. Color is good. Lighting is decent. Composition isn't fantastic but isn't all that rotten. Subject isn't the most interesting. Very clean.

Encircle me I need to be taken down.

CW makes me laugh. I am excited for the impending semester, I have a feeling things will go well on the dorm front. We are going couch shopping and tv shopping soon. I always laugh when I see the word couch because it looks so much like the word crotch hahaha. Sorry.

Everyone needs to read How to be Good by Nick Hornby. I’m barely on page 15 and am in love. I am also currently in love with Tegan and Sara’s The Con, amongst other things.

CW and I were discussing how it is really fun when you take your cell phone out of your pocket and immediately you get a text or call. CW said it was like the best feeling ever. I said it is a good feeling but I could think of ten things that felt better. Here is the list of things that feel better than having your cell phone go off upon taking it out of your pocket, in no particular order:

1. Peeing after having to pee for like 4 hours.
2. Looking into someone’s eyes and knowing they feel the same thing for you that you feel for them.
3. Hugs and kisses.
4. Finishing a project or race or performance or something that required great effort and knowing you couldn’t have done any better and being content and proud of yourself.
5. Getting closure.
6. Christmas.
7. Knowing you have true friends.
8. Looking in the mirror and knowing you look freaking amazing.
9. Laughing until you cry.
10. Those “lightbulb” moments where everything comes together and life makes sense.


The picture is of CW's laundry. Not very artsy-fartsy-photo-amazing. I give myself a F for today. Lighting is good. Subject mildly interesting, I could have done something cool with the piles of clothes or something to make it more interesting. But technically I guess its ok. No effort though. But I did take the picture.

I need to get off this Merry-go-round.

Being the new year, most people come up with resolutions. I happen to be one of those people.

I have lots. I generally do. I still come up with them and find new ones regardless of whether it is new years or the middle of July.

This year I want to take more pictures. Yeah, who would have thought it possible, right? But I want to take at least one every day. I'm not in a photos class so I'm having my own photos class. Anyone else is free to join. The assignment: like I said before, take a picture every day. At least one. Preferably more. Document your life. Or not. Basically just have fun. That is one of my new years resolutions.

Resolution number two: 1 junk food day a week, where I don't care about what I eat. All other days, no junk. That will be hard. Eventually, no junk food at all.

Resolution number three: run 3 miles a day, Monday - Saturday. That is 18 miles a week. That is nothing. There was once a time where I ran 55 a week or so. This should be very do-able.

Resolution number four: No eating after 9. It is pointless.

That is all that I'm able to think of for now that I'm willing to share.

Baking to the Amelie soundtrack is fantastic.

I go back to Provo tonight. Scary, but fun.

Break has proved to be better than I thought. It is nice to remember that the real world does exist and that the whole earth isn't like the Bubble. Horray for starbucks, Lupe, Pita Inn, Kafein, friend's basements, late night bike rides, late night walks, the city, nice stores, etc.


I'm no w back in Provo...the pictures are from the airport in Chicago on my way back here. I love taking pictures of strangers. My flight was delayed an hour so I dropped my backpack and jacket at the terminal with W, got my iPod in and walked around for about an hour and just took pictures. I give myself an A+ for these...I didn't even process them at all, these are straight up raw, and I love them. These are my favorites:

I'm not quite sure what to think.

It is now 2008. Horray?

2007 was fun. Lots happened. I realize that is one of the most vague statements ever. I happen to like vague statements. They tend to be safer to specific ones.

This break has been interesting. It has been really nice to be back in Glenview, I have loved seeing people and catching up and spending time with my family. Wow I sound corny. Hahaha. Seriously though it has been a welcome breath of fresh air. But I'm ready to go back.

Being away from Provo makes me realize, as much as I hate to say it, it is my home at the moment.

Upon arriving home, our tree was void of decorations, it was rather sad. I still find the practice of putting up a pine tree and surrounding it with material goods wrapped in shiny paper and ribbons an absurd way to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ -but that's ok, I love it. So upon seeing the tree undecorated, I went to Walgreens (which I love and missed) and bought a bunch of candy canes. I added some white paper cranes and BIG red ribbons and was rather pleased with the overall effect. It entertained me for a good 3 hours or so.

I was also rather pleased with Christmas as a whole. I did really well on everyone's presents. I went to a midnight mass with a friend and it was a very interesting experience. Very different from my normal church experiences but enjoyable.

New Years was hilarious. Reminiscent of the time my friends and I went downtown and it poured the whole time and we did nothing. The magician and the fireworks were entertaining though.
I still have to finish my 2007 mix and the 10 step sweat pant recovery program for KH. That should keep me busy.
Happy new year, world.